My Meatloaf Has Antlers.

Disclaimer: Please excuse terrible iPhone photos. I promise I'll do better next time. :)

One of the things J and I do at least once a month now (OK, starting last month, but whatever) is go to dinner and a movie. We kicked off this new tradition by heading to one of those fancy theaters with the reclining cushy seats and cocktail bars to see Benedict Cumberbatch star in his Marvel debut: "Doctor Strange."

Before I tell you about dinner let me confess to being a Cumberbitch. Yes. That is what my man Benedict's fanclub of fangirls is called. We are Cumberbitches. If anyone is looking to get me a Christmas present, a Cumberbitch shirt would be amazing. Preferably with a cape so that I can pretend I too am a Tilda Swinton-devotee-time-traveling-time-bending-mirror-dimension-fighting-superhero-who-takes-on-Mads Mikkelsen-the-white-ninja-with-a-cape-related-to-Aladdin's-magic-carpet. That is the plot of the movie, in case you did not get that part.

On the way out, J looked up nearby restaurants that were open and said, "Hey, here's Sage Woodfire Tavern. I've always wanted to go there since like high school."

That's the super-interesting story of why we decided to go here.

My first impression? Oh shit; I did not dress appropriately. See, the word "tavern" in the restaurant title is a tiny bit misleading. When I think tavern, I think hyper-masculine place with beer served in flagons, burgers, steak, mounted game on the walls ... you get my drift. Sage Woodfire Tavern is not that kind of tavern. It's a dark, moody restaurant on the inside with glossed wood tables and candlelit accent lights with live music and high-class decor. "Sage Woodfire Super Fancy Restaurant" would have been a better name. Thankfully, the dark lighting hid my ripped jeans and Converses from public view.

We started off with an appetizer of calamari, which is fried squid. Delicious. There are two ways to mess up fried squid: one, cook it so it's too tough (ew) or two, bland breading (ugh). Sage did neither of those things! The calamari was lightly breaded in a seasoning that had just enough kick to complement the spicy dipping sauce it was served with, but not enough to overpower your palate. The texture was also nice. Each bite required chewing, but it wasn't like you were trying to gnaw through raw, chilled, uncooked pork fat or anything. I thought the garnish of red pepper strips was a weird touch, but I ate them anyway because I do enjoy red pepper.

Along with the appetizer, our server brought bread. The bread was whatever. The dipping oil though? Y'ALL. I would go back just for that. Salt. Oil. Herbs de provence (I asked). Balsamic drizzle. Green onions. Tomatoes. The flavor in this little bowl was amazing! It had everything I could possibly imagine to mix in a dipping oil and then some. Like imagine this on a pasta dish, right?! Hold on; making a mental note to try that.

I had to do some major resisting to avoid eating all of the bread.

The star of the show, though, was this insane meatloaf thing I ordered. LOOK. IT HAS ANTLERS. My meatloaf has. antlers. I have never seen a garnish like this. I'm not sure what I think of it, especially since being a weird meat science person I happen to know that none of the three types of meat in this meatloaf have antlers (beef, veal [baby beef] and pork). But it caught my attention, for sure.

Let me break this entree down for you.

The meatloaf, as I mentioned, was a combination of Angus filet mignon, veal and pork. Those are all three pretty decadent in themselves, but combined? I have never eaten a meatloaf with this much depth of savory flavors. Angus is one of the most common types of beef cattle in America — they're the big black ones you'll see in fields all over the Southeast, especially. It's so popular that it has its own brand with specific requirements to market beef: Certified Angus Beef. The filet mignon is the retail name for a specific cut from the tenderloin, and it is the most tender cut of beef. It also happens to be my favorite, so!

Now, before y'all start yelling at me for eating veal, let me school you a moment.

Veal is baby beef. Beef is technically a meat derived from a steer (castrated male bovine) that is harvested at 12 to 18 months of age. Sidenote: If you're buying grass-finished beef, it's probably closer to 18 to 24 months. Because grass-only puts less fat on meat than a grain-and-grass diet, it takes longer for these animals to get a similar fat covering and thus flavor. Veal calves are harvested younger than 12 months old, and enjoy a mostly milk-based diet. There are also lots of regulations regarding how they are raised in a safe manner with the health of the calves paramount ... but that's another post for another time. Anyway, because the animals are harvested at such a young age, veal is ridiculously tender. Butter-soft. And also naturally mild-flavored (goes back to the calves' diets).

So let's review. The meatloaf has pork (naturally rich and flavorful, because fat is amazing). It has Angus filet (read my lips: t-e-n-d-e-r). It also has veal (tender-er).

I kid you not: forkfuls melted in my mouth. Combined with the mushroom bordelaise sauce, which includes red wine and marrow in its ingredient list, plus soft and fluffy Yukon Gold mashed potatoes and salty wilted spinach ... this is foodgasm-level good. (If you look on the menu, you'll notice the vegetable side was supposed to be steamed vegetables. Gross. I subbed in the wilted spinach.)

Oh, and have I mentioned the portion size yet?! You may think $17 for a meatloaf is bat-guano-crazy, but you get a lot of meatloaf/potatoes/veg for $17. I turned it into three meals. Three so-good meals.

This will definitely be a repeat place — also on the specials menu is tiramisu cheesecake ... what! — but I will probably wear something a little more appropriate for the atmosphere.

A Banger in the Mouth

If you watched "Arrested Development," this title is for you. If you have not yet seen this show, watch the episodes with Mrs. Featherbottom and you will understand. Whether you follow the Bluths or not, you should still read this post and check out The Branded Butcher in Athens, Georgia.

A banger, FYI, is UK slang for "sausage." For example, bangers and mash on a pub menu is sausage and mashed potatoes. I'm picky about a lot of things, sausage being one of them. Breakfast sausage patties especially being one of them. In my experience breakfast sausage is one of those things that comes out either too salty with no other balancing flavors or a little peppery and rubbery. I guess that's why it's always served with pancakes, so the sweetness outweighs the salt. Or you can wrap breakfast sausage in a pancake if you're into fair food at 7 a.m.

I digress. While breakfast sausage is not my favorite meat product, I find bratwurst to be mouthwatering. Prior to this weekend, I only had two places that I would go regularly for bratwurst: the UGA Meat Science Technology Center in Athens and Augsburg Haus in Evans, Georgia. At the UGA MSTC, students and staff actually make meat products from animals harvested from the on-campus slaughter facility. It is fresh, it is local (like, you buy it in the room next to where it's harvested!) and it is dang good. I won't delve into detail about Augsburg Haus right now because I'm suddenly inspired for a visit there soon and it'll get a piece of its own!

I'm adding the habanero bratwurst at Branded Butcher into my top three. Thinking back on this meal makes me hangry. I want to go back for more now.

Habanero bratwurst and a biscuit on the side at The Branded Butcher in
Athens, Georgia

The bratwurst arrives in a little black metal container with creamy, buttery polenta. On top of the polenta is a cross-section of a "cured French horn mushroom," which I'd never eaten before. It was a tad sweet and nutty. The top portion had the soft feel normally associated with fungi, and the closer you got to the volva (base), the filaments got a little closer together, leading to a little more toughness. The accompaniment to all of this was an "agrodolce." When I saw it on the menu, being the super savvy foodie I am, I had no idea what it meant. When I started to write this post I double-checked the menu and then Googled it.

Hopefully I am not the only uncultured person in this world who doesn't know what agrodolce is, so let me teach you. According to the Food Network food encyclopedia (cool; until six seconds ago I did not know this existed), agrodolce is a sweet and sour sauce of Italian origin. In the case of The Branded Butcher, agrodolce is a mix of diced veggies that are sweetened and a little pickled. It added texture to the grits, color to the plate and an awesome flavor mix when you got a bite that had every component of the charcuterie in it: nutty from the 'shroom, salty from the polenta, sweet and sour from the agrodolce, spicy from the bratwurst.

Brown sugar cubes + a glass milk bottle of creamer:
how coffee is served at the Butcher's brunch

I mean, what do you expect when it is called "habanero bratwurst" on the menu, breakfast sausage?! Heck naw, y'all. What I like the most about bratwurst compared to other sausages is how finely ground the meat is inside the casing. The spices and flavor components are blended in better and you're less likely to end up with a giant herb piece stuck in your teeth (reason No. 1 why I shy away from Italian sausage). In essence, a bite of habanero bratwurst looks innocent, because until you shove a forkful into your salivating mouth, you don't realize just how much habanero is in there. I may or may not have asked for a glass of milk (which comes served with a cute little paper straw and I felt like a very happy 6-year-old). But it was so incredible that I couldn't stop myself. The heat hits the tongue, then the back of your throat, but you've got the mushroom and the agrodolce and the savoriness from the meat itself. I say "meat" because traditionally bratwurst is a pork and veal blend, but can be solely pork as well, and the menu here did not specify.

Tip: Get a biscuit on the side. It's well-worth it, because you can turn it into a little breakfast sandwich of habanero bratwurst, sauce and butter. Plus it makes you feel a little more brunch-like if you're showing up and ordering non-breakfast sausage before noon.

Boozy Bonus!

There's a brunch option called The Hipster Breakfast. It is only served after 12:30 p.m. It includes a PBR. I will let you draw your own conclusions.